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Christian Dating Advice for Ladies
As a woman, the greatest thing outside salvation in Christ you could have is a husband that respects and cares for you. Through him you will experience how giving is more fulfilling than receiving. He will comfort you when you're not feeling your best and his strengths will cause you to be radiant! Because he has qualities you need, trust and respect him and by doing this he will feel valuable. When a man feels trusted he'll be strong, hard working and outshine all your expectations - a blessing to you and the people around him. Here's a rough guide to help you understand your differences!
A bit about him...
So what do mean really want most? For better or worse, men generally value power, competency, efficiency and achievement. They are always trying to develop skills and prove themselves. In fact this is not ungodly. It's actually a good way to gain self confidence. These things only become a problem when they are done out of wrong motives and take the place of God.
For most men, fulfillment comes through success and accomplishment rather than sharing and relating. It is the ability to be self sufficient and competent that is most fulfilling to a man. A man, often takes pride in doing things all by himself and doesn't always see we were meant to work together!
Girls... what really motivates a man?
A man is motivated when he feels trusted and respected. Trust your man to energize him! He'll give his best performance in all areas of life when he feels loved!
What do Men Really Want?
In a relationship, a man has two main needs: companionship and yes you've guessed it, intimacy (though for Christians we know this has to wait). Wither way, with regards to the latter, it's much more than looks that drives men wild, it's often far more to do with attitude. He wants a woman to captivate his imagination. Someone confident who wants him as much as he wants her. Someone that will tease him, force him to chase her and yet will also allow him to capture her! He also wants more than anything a soulmate and friend. Someone loving, caring, affectionate and tender who he can talk to have fun with. He wants someone to love him unconditionally who's there for him yet also someone who he can be there for!
How and where to find a Christian Boyfriend (or girlfriend!)
He wants a best friend that will laugh at his jokes, no matter how bad they are! Someone that will take an interest in the things he likes. Someone that will not try to change him, yet who will help him to improve and grow where needed. He wants someone that will trust, respect and admire him. His ideal partner will focus on his good qualities more than than his faults.
How a girl can make him feel special...
- Tell him you wouldn't change a thing about him. (even though it's not true!).
- Don't interrupt him when he speaks.
- Be his biggest fan even when he doubts himself.
- Listen to his kind of music.
- Laugh at his dumb jokes.
- Boys need respect... respect him and he'll achieve amazing and almost miraculous feats of ingenuity and mental strength!
- Trust him completely and he'll morph into Superman before your eyes! (OK don't go over board I hear you say - but you get the drift right?:)
- Drive when he's tired. Oh this one is great!
- Look in his eyes and listen when he talks.
- A girl should always take her man's side - unless of course he's doing something thouroughly reprehensible. If he is - don't confront gim in public - do it gently and privately.
- choose the right time and gentle words to explain that he was a complete idiot without completely crushing his fragile ego!
4 things to beware of!
- It's a mans' natural instinct is to want to 'fix' things - including you! He can't help this - it's practically hard-wired. You're going to need to learn to deal with this and hopefully he will learn to deal wth the fact that you don't ways need fixing!
- He is not always a good listener. Honestly - it is possoble for a man to listen, but you'll need to be patient with him and his short attention span.
- Men don't like unsolicited advice - he's more likely to respond if you refrain from always giving advice!
- It's good for a man to have male friends. Breaking up your his friendships will emasculate him and he won't be worth having!!!
How a man deals with stress
Do not expect your man to be responsive when he has a problem. When stressed he is more inclined to withdraw to find a solution to his problem than to want to talk it over with someone else. He will come back but its a natural process and it may take some time before he emerges so be patient! Too much pressure and he'll withdraw further.
What women do wrong - written by a man!
The biggest complaint men have about women is that they are trying to change them. Men are like children, by constantly telling him what to do he'll feel controlled and put up defenses. The best way to change a man (if he's actually letting you down) is to love (encourage) him as if he's got no faults(ha), but gently show him where he's letting you down - i.e. don't give him or give in to everything! He'll soon realise he hasn't been playing ball and he'll want to improve himself! If anything remember the following rule: men love to improve themselves but hate being improved. The psychology is simple - male ego and pride are our biggest problem and easily dented, so be firm but gentle!
Four things guaranteed to upset a male! (or your money back!)
- Frequently offer unsolicited advice. Have you read about Armageddon in The Bible?... wel it's not unlike the results procured here!
- Change tack every 10 seconds during a conversation! Without waiting for the answer or him to reply. Right or wrong he will go nuts so don't say you were'nt warned!
- Expect him to react like a woman!
- Try to change him! Look - man can chnage but they hate it when they percieve that someone is trying to do it, so the trick ladies is do it in a way where he doesn't feel all undermined and trodden on. In other worlds he will chance as long as he hasn't been made to feel stupid. I know - it's silly but men are spuupsed to be leaders and not treating them as such in public or at least in a disrespectful way will cause problems.
Related Christian Subjects
copyright © 2002. This page is a help guide article written by Fusion101.com Christian dating advice service for women on understanding men, how to understand a man, what he's thinking, advice on boys for girls. What men want from women, boyfriend help and advice for girls, tips for women on how to understand a man generally!
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